Wimbledon: Men’s Semifinal Preview

Casual Tennis Fan: Wait. What’s he doing here?

Casual Tennis Authority: Who? Jo-Willy?

CTF: Yeah. Wasn’t he down two sets to Federer? Nobody comes back from that.

CTA: Nobody had at a Grand Slam. 178-for-178. But it’s a different Federer. Maybe a different Jo-Willy, too. Sure, Fed looked like a bystander in his own match, but hand it to a Tsonga: it was more about what he did than what Fed didn’t.

CTF: Still, people are going to wonder if it’s the end of Federer.

CTA: Naturally. That only really becomes a problem if he starts to wonder it. Although it’s always the athlete who’s the last to know. At least he’s not playing in New York and batting .260.

CTF: Or longing for his poodle. I wanted the rematch with Djokovic.

CTA: So did ESPN. Tsonga won’t disappoint, though. Maybe it’s his time. He’s got a 5-2 lifetime record against Djokovic. Then again they haven’t played since Djokovic upgraded his operating system, so it’s hard to say if the record is relevant. My guess is it will be tight. Their matches always are. Tsonga will put on a good show: big serves, pummeling forehands, grass stains. When the hands are shook, though, Djokovic will have the bigger smile.

CTF: Good. I don’t like that dance Tsonga does when he wins.

CTA: Why not? The guy’s just exuberant.

CTF: I think he looks like an ass.

CTA: It’s usually a fine line between the two.

CTF: What about the other match? Is that British guy with the teenage facial hair finally going to win?

CTA: Murray? He’s looked convincing. He can, and has, beaten Nadal at Slams, too.

CTF: Not last year, though. Nadal whupped him pretty good.

CTA: You remember that. Murray will be wise not to.

CTF: What about Nadal’s bum ankle? Will it be a factor?

CTA: Only if he loses.

CTF: Will he?

CTA: (Sigh)…75 years and counting.

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